Sexual tension at work

Sexual tension in the workplace is probably an inevitability for all of us at least once in our careers.

“Sexual intercourse is a grossly over-rated pastime; the position is undignified, the pleasure momentary, and the consequences utterly damnable” Lord Chesterfield

Despite Chesterfield’s opinion of one of the things involved, many people are fans of sexual tension. It can of course be exhilarating and pleasing, much in the same way as any romantic connection can.  There is the added twist of risk but the added advantage that seemingly innocent excuses can be found for crossing paths with a favoured colleague.  As with all relationships, complications ensue – however, there are ways to enjoy things whilst at the same time not damage your professional reputation, productivity or promotional prospects.

1. Flirting

Flirting can be a lot of fun, and is often a low-key way to make a connection with someone, either out of client focus or out of a desire to find out more about what someone is like.  It is also relatively risk-free, no one has ever been sued for sexual harassment for flirting.  Like anything though, flirting can go too far, but if it’s piece-by-piece this risk is diminished immensely.  Most people do like to be flirted with, whether this flirting takes the form of charm, attention or just a pleasing conversation that is not immediately within the bounds of work or shares a joke.  Flirting may seem like a daunting prospect, but if you are a bit confident (or sound it) this will help, have a few stories and ideas about things and express them at the right moment.  Often it’s all in the timing, so if you are wanting to see it done well, watch actors do it on telly or comedians on panel shows, and just see how they do it.

2. Listen

The main thing with any relationship forming is to listen.  I would still advise responding to what happens in whatever way is appropriate, but it could only be a smile or a nod.

3. Make a connection

This can be regarded as a step on from flirting, and is closer to building a longer-term relationship, either for something romantic or just a client/supplier one.  Either way this is the time when your experience in relationships and ability to listen will come to the fore, and your ‘feel’ for how things are going will be helpful to you.  This may sound daunting but again, it’s not – just let it happen.  You will enjoy it as much as you want to.

4. Be affectionate

Small actions can also be of great importance here.  But again, take your time, no matter how much you may want to take things further quickly it may be best to establish a connection which is clearly not work-based before doing this – just so do not get hurt.

So, that bit extra can occur and be useful, but above all do not worry and stay in control.  Do not feel you should get involved in something you do not want, but equally do not let think they will have something they will not.  Enjoy

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[ Tagged In ] colleague, professional reputation, sexual harassment, sexual tension

is your workstation, office or desk at the right height?

We all like to feel comfortable at work, and know intuitively that we can get more done when we are comfortable.  This forms a big part of our philosophy here at relaxedworkplace.com.  We are also aware that everyone is different, but despite that so many offices and desks all look the same.  We asked, how we can make that a bit more personal.  Health and Well-being consultant for relaxedworkplace.com, Samuel Furse looked into it for us and gives us his five things you can do to make your workstation, office or desk fit like a glove:

Step One – the right height.  Most desks are of a roughly-standard height.  While this might be fine for a lot of people, it can actually be dangerous for those of us who find it hard to reach things or for those of us who are taller than average.  Most companies are required by law to have a Health and Safety officer and therefore a Health and Safety policy.  If you are finding your desk or work surface is at an uncomfortable height, or you have had medical problems that restrict your movement, consult your H&S officer and see if this comes under the company’s duty of care to employees.  In a poll conducted in the summer of 2009 over 90% office workers over six feet tall and under 5’2” said they felt they would benefit from a height –adjusted desk.

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[ Tagged In ] good sitting posture, health and safety, medical problems, office workers, personal health, posture, safety policy, workstation

Comfortable work clothes

“Dress sharply and they notice the dress.  Dress impeccably and they notice the woman – Coco Chanel”

This was quoted by Sigourney Weaver in the 80s classic film Working Girl, to Melanie Griffith.  Although we all love to look just right of not really good, this can be a burden in the current financial climate and is only compounded if we ever need to don personal protective equipment (PPE) for any of our work tasks, writes relaxedworkplace.com’s health and well-being consultant Samuel Furse.

Other clothing worries our clients have told us about are in looking right for the role and feeling good at the same time.  In the third quarter of 2009, 59.6% of female respondents approved of the attire worn on casual days in the professional environment. This is a 10.9% increase on three years ago, indicating a growing acceptance of relaxed wardrobes in the work place.

“I absolutely think that there’s a firm middle ground in office dressing today,” offers Jeannine McShane, a performance specialist with Employee Performance Strategies, a training consulting company based in Washington, USA. “It’s not like it used to be, where women wore suits and dresses five days a week to make a statement about their professional commitment. Of course, office attire is not about ignoring what you’re wearing, but dressing appropriately and keeping the emphasis on what truly counts; job performance,” she told us.

We know that our clients place productivity, client focus and project deliverables at the top of the list at work, but if you feel your clothes let you down, you’ll want an answer.  How do we solve this?  Well, here is relaxedworkplace.com’s simple 5 step-guide to getting kitted out for work functions, safety tasks, away days, training and anything else your boss can throw at you

Step 1 – Be comfortable.  If you look at a suit, dress, or combo and think you’ll never be comfortable in it, it’ll never be worth buying it.  People can see if you are not comfortable and this will only make things harder for you in the long run.  The worst-case scenario is that it lowers your productivity and damages your client focus – it’s just the sort of thing that can take your eye off the ball, and no one wants that.

Step 2 – Be practical. If you find an outfit that looks great, do a quick mental check that it will help you out at work.  After all, if it lets you down, it’ll never put you in a good light.  Also, take confidence in yourself to be clever – hidden pockets, adjustable sizing and removable layers are all great if you find yourself moving from one room to another, one situation to another or for making an outfit multi-seasonal.

Step 3 – Plan ahead. An excellent opportunity for clothes shopping if nothing else, but planning what you’ll wear is as important as planning the deadlines and those deliverables.  So, take the time to pick up an outfit or two on your day off, you never know when they might be useful.  Planning also means that you don’t have to splash out every time you buy new clothes.  It’s amazing how cheaper clothing from on-line retailers and auction sites can be just as good or better than High Street retailers with a bit of planning

Step 4 – Choice. Give yourself a choice!  No one wants to wear the same thing over and again, and clients, colleagues and senior staff you want to make a good impression on for that promotion will only be impressed if you show freshness and variation in what you wear.  Also, it means that when you get up in the morning you can put on what feels just right – whether it’s for a project meeting, interview, board meeting, field trip or business lunch, you’ll be right in there.

Step 5 — Be true to yourself.  Trust your own instincts – that’s good advice for real women and cinematic sirens alike.  Coco Channel would surely approve!

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[ Tagged In ] coco chanel, office attire, professional commitment, professional environment, work functions, work tasks, working girl